the curse

So it seemed my tile problems were solved didn't it? Went back to Home Depot and bought the tiles I need for the shower and drove to Bay City today to order the rest from the very nice lady and oh gee, the large mottled tile is no longer on the manufacturer's website though it is still listed on the most recent product list they have which is only a few months old.

Of course. Of course!!!

She called the company who has a bad habit of not answering their phone, she says, apparently in an attempt to get people to do their business on-line, to check for product availability and of course they wouldn't answer their phone while I was sitting there. I'll keep trying she says and call you later this afternoon with good news. It's 6:30 PM and I still haven't heard back.

There is some good news though as I had previously done an internet search for this tile so I was pretty sure it was still available at some of the bigger national tile and flooring places and I only need 3 boxes so when I got home I looked it up again and found a place in Florida that has it. So I have a back-up if she doesn't come through.

Rocky and Bill the plumber were supposed to show up last Thursday after Bill's helper crapped out on him and he prevailed upon Rocky to come help him on Wednesday in exchange for inserting me immediately after but Bill fell Wednesday and banged up his knee and had to go to the ER so his job needed another day on Thursday but we'll be here Friday Rocky tells me. Friday morning Rocky comes by to ask on Bill's behalf if I'd be OK with putting it off til Monday so Bill could go back to the ER and get his knee X-rayed to make sure it wasn't broken now that the swelling was going down. What was I supposed to say, that I would rather Bill and his banged up knee come and finish the work? Rocky was all apologetic. I figured what's a few more days. Even if they had showed up Friday, it's already too late to get the bathroom finished before I leave.

This is why I try not to have expectations. Life is just putting out one fire after another.

The flooring is in in the back bedroom though. Now just need the quarter round and it's done.

resolution of the blues and other matters

I'm having to keep the back door closed. I would rather it was open but the damn dirt daubers will not stay out! I finally gave up. I chased three of them out about mid-day and closed the door and while I was standing there looking out through the glass here came one of them back, buzzing around, looking for a way in, banging on the glass. I have to get a screen door.

I moved or it did but it didn't appreciate getting its picture taken and left

I've been getting my garden that I wasn't going to plant this year, planted. So far 8 tomatoes, 46 onions, 1 japanese eggplant, 1 bell pepper, 1 banana pepper (I threw away armloads of banana peppers from 4 plants last year). Still have part of the white bed and the whole big one.

I've put away the model making for now as it's hard to work while construction is going on and since the spring open house fizzled out, there's no rush to finish anything and I can't really get to the functioning kiln anyway with the garage full of construction materials and it's spring and the garden needs to be planted and the flower beds and landscaping need attending to, and things in pots need refreshing all before the interminable hot dry summer sets in and I'm going to be gone for most of the month of May.

And so because I gave in and planted a small garden at least and had Marc turn the water back on over at the shop which had been turned off for the weeks of lows in the 20s and just never turned back on, and hooked up the hose and...nothing, bubkis. Went around to the back corner faucet where it connects to the shop and some water came out, not great pressure and then it trickled to a stop. So, the clog is somewhere between the meter and the faucet. Underground. It's a long way from the faucet to the fence. In the meantime, I'm having to haul water over in buckets in the garden cart to water my newly planted garden. 

So, back to the blues, Rocky and Gunner came by Thursday morning to see if they were going to start painting or not. Gunner finished the ceiling and beadboard early Wednesday afternoon which gave me a chance to test out the two blue samples I had on some scrap pieces of sheetrock and then I held them up to the wall above the bead board and WHOA! Way too dark. So when the Rocky and Gunner Show showed up Thursday morning and Rocky asked me what color, I told him to go on with the yellow, that these were way too dark. So you're giving up on the blue, he asked? I shrugged. I'd have to waste another day picking a new color or two. If I want to do that, he says, he has to replace a bathtub in this other house and they could take care of that and get done there and paint on Friday. It seemed to be what Rocky wanted so I agreed.

Back to the paint store where I picked a nice light blue, a little grayer than baby blue, painted the piece of sheet rock and carried it in there and held it up above the painted beadboard and...the tint is good but it didn't thrill me, so yellow it is. All that's left is the trim, then the glass, then the floor. 

progress as of end of day Friday

I really like the blue color though, so I tested it out with the tile samples for the floor and shower and they go very well together. Now the plan is to paint the beadboard in the bathroom blue and the walls above it in one of the whites I'm looking at. 

Currently waiting to rise to the top of the plumbers list.

weekend woes

It was mild on Saturday and I thought to prune the rest of the roses but it was also drizzly and not even a heavy drizzle but enough that you would be wet enough if you stayed out in it long enough. So I decided to pull all the plumerias and the bird of paradise and the nun's orchid and the star of india and the angel trumpet out of the garage and give everything a good watering and sweep all the leaves and dirt out in an effort to excavate the kiln with an eye to start casting stuff again and so I left it all out on the concrete apron in front of the barn totally exposed to the north because it wasn't supposed to get any colder than a quick dip to 40˚. Then winter came back Saturday night. Of course it did!

The weather app on my phone sucks.

Went out Sunday morning at 9 AM in 35˚ with a strong constant north wind to meet and hear Beto O'Rourke speak outdoors! about the future we want for the country. 9 AM on a Sunday morning isn't a great time in this religious republican town to attract people to his town hall meeting but it was the only slot available in his very busy schedule. Beto is currently a representative in Congress and he is running to unseat Ted Cruz as one of our senators. About 30 of us showed up but I'm uncertain how many were part of Beto's entourage. I did see a few familiar faces. We think there are more democrats in this town then conventional wisdom purports but, as I've said before, this is a mean little town and the republicans here aren't above punishing democrats who make themselves known by boycotting their businesses or spreading rumors or shunning them in social situations. The rare democrat who has the guts to put a political sign in their yard is brave indeed. Anyway, it was cold as shit but only lasted about half an hour and I'm glad I went. I guess I'm going to get more active in the local scene having signed up and checked the box for volunteering.

And the rest of the day was cold as shit too and since none of the little anemone flowers were open because it was wet and gray and cold, we decided to rent a movie. If you ever saw Kingsman: the Secret Service and enjoyed it and think you might be tempted to see the sequel, Kingsman: the Golden Circle...don't. It was really awful.

And this morning it is 33˚. Did I mention the weather app on my phone sucks? And that the tropicals are still out on the driveway? I do think they'll be OK but I should have waited just two more days as we start a warming trend today. But could I wait two more days? Nooo.

I did make a little progress on the model Saturday, roughing out two of the little flowers.

reclaiming my space and a big decision

I did get my desk top and printer moved on Wednesday so, of course, the curse Rocky showed up on Thursday to finish up the punch list and my desk had to be moved once again for him to get the hooks in the ceiling but they put it all back for me. It's set up like before because it's a familiar configuration but I think it will evolve because...

In January, Marc will get his first SS check and combined with mine we will have a regular dependable income and health care for the first time in our working life together. We've had many years when we made more than we will be getting and many more years when we made less and years when we had hardly any income but never have we had an amount that was dependable month after month. Since moving out here or really since we sold the Houston house/shop in 2014, commissions have been few and farther apart. This year we had two small jobs in February and no other inquiries and thought we were retired by default except for one proposal that, if the art glass stays in the budget, will come up next year. And then this fall, after the flood, two more possible jobs came up. They are willing to wait til after the first of the year while we get the house and shop put back together so that we can do the work.

So what all this is leading up to is that we were talking the other night and decided that after we do these two jobs (and the third if it comes through because I have already committed us to it), we are going to purposely retire from the etched glass commission work. As of now, we are no longer going to accept new jobs. It's not that our combined SS is a huge amount but it is an amount that we can easily live on as we are used to a simple lifestyle and we are both over the etched glass work and after having no work this year I'm not really of a mind to start that whole thing up again.

Now that Rocky won't be back until after New Year's to start on the next part of the re-build I've been slowly excavating my stuff from the piles of boxes but I don't want to hang anything on the walls until I get whatever furniture I need in here. However, the kites and star lights are back up!

oh ye of little faith

I did an image search for the word stupid and I can rightfully say my stupid doesn't even touch the stupid the search brought up so this post remains unillustrated.

If I hadn't already proved what a total idiot I seem to be turning into with my two brain farts the week I was gone, I'm totally convinced of it now.  

Reality has indeed intruded.

In the last 24 hours I knocked the side view mirror off my son's car, failed to bring my tape measure to make a pattern and measure a space, and I lost my iPad.

I can tell you where and to the minute that I lost it.  I just didn't realize it at the time and when I did it was too late.  I went back, was only gone 40 minutes tops and that includes two wrong turns, but there was no sign of it.

After my appointment yesterday morning to take a pattern and I discovered my tape measure had not made it into my bag before I left home, I went to the church we did several years ago to photograph it again because I had lost all the large format pictures when the computer they were stored on crashed.

When I was done, I walked out to the parking lot, put my iPad on the rail of the truck bed just behind the cab, reached into my bag for the keys, unlocked the door, got in and drove off.  When I got to my next destination I was early so I reached into my bag for the iPad except it wasn't there and was nowhere in the truck.  I thought for a minute and...

damn damn damn

Rushed back to the church and of course it was nowhere to be seen so I went inside.  Not at the welcome desk in the lounge, not turned into the school office, not turned into the main office.

fuck fuck fuck

Back I went to Hot Glass Houston to buy the opal powders I wanted and one of the guys there told me that if I went to the Apple store they could probably locate it for me.  As it happened there was an Apple store in the nearby mall, so I thought it was worth a shot.

But no.  Apparently I had the cloud function turned off because it didn't show up.

damn damn damn

So what to do?  I use my iPad every day as a portfolio, as a computer away from home, as a communication device with my grandkids and kids, and many other things.  Wait a couple of days and see if it turns up, which I didn't consider likely, that if whoever found it was going to turn it in they would have already or just go ahead and bite the bullet and buy a new one since I was right there?

The fact that they had a new upgraded version was a carrot.  A big carrot.  So after consulting with Marc, I bought a new one.

That was yesterday.

Got a phone call today from the church.  They have it.  Whoever found it didn't turn it in to any of the offices but instead just put it on a table in the lounge and it wasn't discovered until today.

8. ellen has a small panic

Thursday evening after our studio time we started the individual presentations.    We had all thought that we would be giving our presentations the first day but Catharine chose to wait until we had had time to get to know each other and work in the studio some so that our interaction would not be influenced by our work.

I think it was a good strategy but almost immediately I had trouble remembering who did what work so I was glad to get the list of web sites.  I do remember that everyone's work, no matter how long they had been working in the medium, showed an artistic bent and skill.  For some of the artists the bulk of the body of their work was not in glass.  

Suzanne worked in metal, Denise took amazing photographs and did collages as well.  Laura dyed textiles and others had also done work in other mediums.  Estelle, besides working in glass folding frit wafers and fortune cookies, studied a particular style of dying cloth in Japan.  Leigh is a painter; Cindy, a jeweler and photographer.  Natali walked across Spain, which doesn't have anything to do with glass but is an impressive feat anyway.  Louise is a flame worker.  Marti did wonderful figurative work.  

Catharine had scheduled me for Thursday evening and so after we returned from the studio, I went down to my room to get the printed out copy of my presentation, my little speech, the one I had worked on for three days, ignored my anniversary for.  Catharine had already downloaded the images onto her computer from my thumb drive but the paper was the only copy of the words I had.

And I couldn't find it.

I tore through my bag with the stuff I had been lugging around several times.  Needless to say, I was in a minor panic.  I had misplaced my folder that I received upon arriving with all the pertinent info several days previous and I thought I must have tucked it in there.

I rushed to the piano room where we were getting set up and calmly explained to Catharine what had happened freaked out.

Of course, I didn't even save a copy on my computer but I did have an earlier version I had printed out on my desk that Marc could scan and email me.

That is if I could get him on the friggin' phone.  It went to voicemail.  So I called again and it went to voicemail again so I'm standing in the hall of this wonderful serene place and I'm yelling into the phone 'call me now!'.

And then I returned to the piano room and turned my phone off.

hee hee

After the first four, we took a little break and when I walked in to the dining room, there on the tables we used for our morning meetings was a blue folder.  I walked over, flipped it open, and there was my presentation.

When I checked my phone I had two semi-panicked messages.

Never mind, I told him sweetly when I called him back.

more next post

packing

It took me three days to write my presentation and to select and prepare the images for the slide show. I also finally got photo albums of the etched glass and pate de verre prepared and categorized and uploaded to my iPad. I recently upgraded my operating system and all my previous albums disappeared.

Just as well as I had uploaded the two main folders for both types of work and had about 10 versions of every single item in those folders. Very confusing and unorganized and hard to find the one image I'm trying to show someone. Now I must import pictures to iPhoto and create my albums there and then I can upload them to the iPad. Before, I only had to select the folders on my hard drive.

I've also assembled the few things I am taking with for 'familiar and experimental' studio ingredients. Basically what I'm taking is pencils, erasure, colored pencils, sketchbook. Beyond that, I'm stumped although I think if I have time I'll go get a packet of origami paper.

Today, I packed. But first I had to wait for the laundry to get done. I tried to ferret out all my dirty clothes because it was going to take just about all my clothes, at least the ones I wear and am comfortable in and not outright rags, though I am bringing one of those.

The problem is, I've forgotten what I wear for low 60s˚ - low 80s˚ so I need a selection.

And I want to bring my small feather pillow. That's the hardest thing for me, sleeping away from home, not having the right pillow.

And I only want to take one bag and not check it so I'm limited in size.

After my first try, when I had got everything in, I realized I hadn't packed any shoes.

I might want shoes. And they take up a lot of space.

I have a shoulder bag I'll be carrying too and before I knew it I had 5 pairs of shoes selected.

OK, that seems a little excessive especially for someone who goes barefoot all the time. They want us to bring a dedicated pair of shoes to wear inside the center so we don't track dirt in so that's 1. I need a pair of shoes with good support for hiking and working in the glass studio so that's 2. I need a pair of sandals so that's 3 minimum.

Second try, I remembered that this bag has a small extension built in so I unzipped that, put everything in including the pillow, and zipped the bag closed. Then I sat on it til I could zip the extension closed.

So I guess I'm ready to go.

I was out surveying the yard as I am wont to do, seeing how everything was at the end of the day when I spied this:

This is my desert rose that I have had at least six years. A friend gave me it as a rooted cutting when I admired hers. It has grown well, is a beautiful specimen of a plant. It has never bloomed. Everyone I know who has a desert rose, bigger, smaller, fewer branches; theirs bloom.

So now it appears that mine is finally going to reward me with a flower and I won't be here to see it.

There was a time when I might have asked the universe, 'why?'

But we all know the answer to that question now, don't we...

the curse

my fight or flight has been active all day

A few pics from around the yard while I fret over getting started on this big job.

I spied these strange little spores? eggs? coming off the stem of my moonflower vine. They are actually only about 3/16” long. I have no idea what they are.

The anoles and geckos have started to hatch and I spied this little guy on one of the azaleas. It couldn't have been more than an inch from the tip of its nose to it hind legs.

The morning glory bush finally started blooming. True to its name, the flowers open in the morning and close by noon.

The orb weaver is still hanging out in the same spot though it does reposition the web now and then.

I have several clumps of these swamp lilies that I transplanted from the Houston house but this is the only one that blooms so far.

We finally got our deposit on Aug. 6 and have made some progress towards getting the rented shop ready. I had initially told them that we would need at least two weeks once we got our deposit to get the place ready. Essentially, we have to start from scratch with tables and a temporary sandblast booth and the air compressor and air delivery system. We've made some progress but here at the end of the two weeks we still have not had them deliver the glass.

Part of the problem is that when I laid out the time period, we had a clear calendar. So of course, the deposit came in the worst possible month and the worst possible timing. Because we don't have a clear calendar for the month of August.

Someone beat them to the punch as far as deposits go so we have had to work on that job and I also, weeks before we got funded, agreed to dog sit for my sister while she goes to visit her stepson and his family the 22 – 28. Realistically, it's going to be the end of the month before we can schedule them to bring the glass. Perhaps the beginning of next week at the earliest. But after that, we should be on track.

on being bit by a snake

The reason I've been AWOL this week is that Monday evening I got nailed by a copperhead out in the yard. Here's the rather long story.

A few days ago,  I was browsing someone's blog and saw pictures of amaryllis in bloom and remembered that mine had not, so far, bloomed.  I had delayed getting them in the ground last year after I dug them up from the city house last spring and what with the drought and all I wondered if they would bloom so I went out into the yard to check on them.  I had planted them in several locations to see where they might do best.

After checking on the ones I had planted near the new shop, which to my delight had bloom stalks just beginning to emerge, I walked to the back edge of the property where it adjoins the 13 Acre Field to admire the poppies and then over to the bed I put in of rocket larkspur around the peach tree that has reverted to its wild cousin root stock that grows next to the old shed at the back corner where the Wild Space begins, the 30' foot wide or so area of trash trees, underbrush, honeysuckle, trumpet flower and wild grape vines, and poison ivy that separates my neighbor's property from the field.

I was barefoot as is my wont and totally unconcerned as I walk around there quite often and Marc had just mowed the previous day, not that the growth had been high as it was mostly dead thatch back there.  I stepped about a foot away from the edge of the bed, my eye on the amaryllis there at the base of the peach tree when I felt this sudden intense burning stab of pain on my right foot.  

I think I shouted something like, 'Ow!  What the fuck was that!', thinking I must have brushed up against a nettle or something.  Or something.  Why I thought of nettle first thing is beyond me because I know there is none growing there, but that's what first popped into my head.

I had stepped back when I felt the pain and looked down and saw the snake coiled up in a series of compact S's making about a 6" diameter circle before my mind really processed what I was seeing.  I bent over and picked up a stick and poked the brown and tan bundle and it wasn't until then that my brain yelled 'snake!'.  And then, 'copperhead'.  At that point fear and panic took over and with my foot on fire I ran/limped back to the house and as soon as I hit the garage door I started yelling for Marc, 'I've been bit by a copperhead!'

I was hyperventilating by then but Marc got me to calm down somewhat.  My foot still looked unmarked and I could not even see any puncture marks but within a couple of minutes a lump about the size of a half dollar raised up and two little droplets of blood oozed out. 

So being a pair of modern living folks, the first thing we did was google copperheads to see what should be done. It was good news and bad news.  The good news was that copperhead bites are rarely fatal and then only in the very young and the very old or if there is a serious allergic reaction to the venom.  The bad news was that all the sites said it would take about 10 days to recover and to seek medical attention anyway.

Since I wasn't absolutely certain that it was a copperhead, as the common rat snake in these parts look just like a copperhead, and I hadn't had the presence of mind to look at its pupil whereby I could have definitely identified it and I didn't want to go to the emergency room if I didn't have to being uninsured as we are and the Internet said that snakes usually stay within 20 ' of where the bite takes place, I got it in my head that we should go back out there and try and find it.

So, armed with a one gallon bucket (me) and the heavy rake (Marc) don't ask, I have no idea what we thought we were going to do with a bucket and a heavy rake we headed back out into the yard.  My foot was still on fire and the pain was spreading and getting more intense but I could still walk though I was limping heavily.

Of course, there was no sign of the snake by the time we got out there and we really didn't feel like poking around in the nearby concealing underbrush so we gave it up and headed back to the house.  Only by now the pain was so bad I couldn't walk on that foot at all and Marc had to carry me piggy back to the house which was a hilarious sight all in its own as I was barely hanging on by the time we got there.

I was still dithering about going to the hospital even though my foot was becoming swollen and discolored.  Marc helped me into the bathroom so I could wash off the wound and put antibiotic ointment on it and then he made the decision so while he was getting keys and stuff, I crawled to the garage door and then hopped on one foot to the truck after making my two word post on FB.

Since there was nowhere to park at the emergency room door, Marc dropped me off so he could park.  As I was hopping to the entrance, someone inside saw me and rushed out and helped me inside.  No sooner had I sat down in the small waiting area than they had a wheelchair and were wheeling me back to a room where they examined me, drew blood, gave me an IV and started a fluid drip.  About that time I started having shivering episodes and my whole body was tensed.

By now the fiery pain was no longer centered on the bite and was being replaced by a deep throbbing with the burning moving with the swelling and my whole foot was hot to the touch.  The swelling had not even taking over my whole foot yet as my inside ankle was still clearly defined.  The doctor drew the outlines of of the swelling on my foot and ankle to help monitor it's progression, sort of like pushing a stick in the riverbank to see if the water was rising and how fast.

Then there was nothing to do but wait.  For 6 hours.  Flat on my back.  They'd come in and take my vitals now and then but mostly we passed the time with our books which Marc had gone back to fetch.  After an hour or so I asked for some pain medication which didn't do a damn thing for the pain in my foot but did allow me to relax and it stopped the shivering.

About 4 hours after the first blood draw, they came in to do another.  By that time the swelling had traveled about half way up my calf.  The doctor came in and checked my progress and told me that depending on the results of this second blood test one of three things would happen.  They would send me home or they would administer anti-venom and put me in intensive care or they would send me immediately to a bigger and better facility.

As it happened, my blood test showed no damage so they sent me home.  The swelling would continue to increase, he said, and I should be on the lookout for loss of circulation to my foot if the swelling got too bad but that everything looked good, I was to continue to stay flat on my back for a few days and it would take about two weeks to completely heal.

So here I am, camped out on the couch.  By Tuesday morning the swelling had advanced to just below my knee and by Tuesday night it had reached all the way up my leg to my crotch.  Yesterday (that would be Tuesday) I pretty much stayed doped up on pain pills and dozed off and on throughout the day.  Today (Wednesday) I'm feeling better.  The swelling had maxed out and this morning it had started to diminish.  I still can't walk but I can at least get to the bathroom by myself now by scooting along on the floor.

It is still painful, a deep throbbing ache, especially if I try to lower my leg like I might try to stand up and my skin is extremely sensitive to touch so I'm still taking the pain pills but I hope that will be better by tomorrow as the swelling continues to decrease.

Marc has been wonderful, attending to my needs, bringing me food and drinks, fetching me what ever I ask for, getting me to the bathroom and back on the rolling office chair.

Emma, the cat, has also been very attentive, camped out in the rolling chair beside me since I got home Monday night, not leaving my side except to eat and go out briefly to take care of her business and then returning immediately.  She's even climbed up in my lap a few times.  Very unusual behavior for a cat who's idea of affection is sitting in the same room as you.

next:  what I learned about copperheads

ponder us

Once again I am preparing for a foray into the city, this time for 3 days while I try to drum up some business, get these molds in the kiln and help my g'girls with their Halloween costumes. So I leave you with these...

modern zen koans

Why does my head feel so big when I'm looking out of it but so small when I put my hands up to it?

Why is it that every time I wake in the middle of the night and listen for the clock to chime to know what time it is, it always chimes just once for the half hour?

Why do teen sizes come in odd numbers and women's sizes come in even numbers when I'm a woman who wears an odd number?

Why do the chiggers bite me and not him?

Why is it that every time I forget and leave the soaker hose on all night, it rains the next day?

Why does the cat always want out at 5 o'clock in the morning?

Why don't guys wear tank tops? On second thought, after seeing my neighbor in one, I'm glad they don't.

Why do all the big ticket items always crap out at the same time?

Why do meteor storms always peak between 3 AM and 5 AM?

Why is it still summer in late October?

none for me, thank you

We've had a rainy weekend here and the cat expresses her displeasure every time she comes in. We've been getting rain fairly regularly since September and let me tell you, the mosquitos that didn't bother us all the long dry summer are fierce and abundant out there now. Even when it's not raining you can't stay out for long unless you want to coat your skin with poison. It takes them less than a minute to zero in on you.

I'm not a big fan of poison myself. I've never understood why people spread poison all around their homes and yards on a regular basis. My neighbor, when the kids were growing up, would always warn me when they sprayed their yard and around their house so that I could make sure the kids didn't go over there for a day or two. I also don't get the anti-bacterial craze. I prefer to keep my good bacteria alive and my immune system strong.

When I was younger, in my pre-glass days, I and my then husband bought some poison for roaches from an exterminating place and only read the cautions and warnings after we got home. I was so horrified that I didn't even want to touch the glass jug. We returned it to them, asking for our money back. The salesman/exterminator guy reacted with scorn and derision and by way of demonstrating how harmless the stuff was put a coin in the gum machine, got a gum ball, sprayed it with some of the same stuff and popped it in his mouth. I'm sure my revulsion must have shown on my face as he laughed at us on our way out.

You will never convince me that poisons and neurotoxins are targeted and safe. That doesn't mean I haven't bombed my house a time or two in desperation but I am acutely aware of absorbing the residue.

Because I see something fundamentally wrong with poisoning my home and environment I've become a live and let live kinda gal. My spiritual outlook was evolving too. When you pay attention, it's amazing how many things humans kill in the course of a day, without thinking. Without it even being necessary. I raised my kids to respect all life and to refrain from killing some small creature just because it is there or stripping a tree or shrub of leaves out of idleness. I've tried to teach the same to my grandkids, to not step on that little bug there on the ground that deserves it's own small life just as much as they do, to be gentle and not cause injury to the lizard or garden snake or toad or butterfly that they have caught out of curiosity. It's why I catch insects and lizards in the house and release them outside, it's why I rescue goats from dogs and possums out of rain barrels, why I let the wasp nests stay and encourage the fire ants to bed in the field. I refrain from killing or disturbing that which does me no harm. It's why my property is a no kill zone.

And so, if there is little justice in the world, at least there is irony.

I'm a country girl now. I live in a little neighborhood in the county outside a small town sandwiched between agricultural fields. The crop duster was back the other day zooming low over our house to make his banking turns as he sprayed defoliant on the cotton. Defoliant. Heinous stuff.

I stayed inside thankful that it was, at least, a windless day.

*if you are here via the link from agairupdate, read this one too.

the pledge

picture via http://superduper.co.za/lucky/?p=910

I'm starting to feel the pain now. Withdrawal is setting in. So many pictures are lost from the hard drive crash on the old computer.

All the pictures of what the country house looked like on the inside when we got it. There goes my 'then and now' post.

All my sunset pics for the year. There goes my 'the year in sunsets' post.

A lot of my flower pictures but those I can take again when their season comes around.

All the pictures of the grandkids taken the past 8 months. totally irreplaceable.

All the raw footage from all the pictures of our jobs the last year. Fortunately I had transferred the 'doctored' pics over already.

Now the downside of digital camera-ry becomes apparent. Lazy people do not print out their pictures. Lazy people do not back up their hard drives. Lazy people lose their pictures.

So in the grand tradition of closing the barn door after the cows have got out, I have now installed the camera software on my (the new) computer. I never bothered before because I hadn't been able to install my version of Photoshop (it keeps telling me that there is missing or invalid personalization information) and without a graphics program, I didn't see the point. Especially since my new Mac has a slot for the memory chip in my camera and will transfer the images directly from it, bypassing the whole having to plug in the camera thing. I only recently discovered that I can crop, resize, and adjust the levels in Preview, finally being desperate enough to explore a little further into the program. What a nitwit. I thought it was just for viewing images.

I hereby pledge to back up my stuff. I even have a nifty little function that will do it automatically if I will just go get the thingy that it backs it all up on and plug it in. In the meantime, I have a stack of empty media discs...in 

Houston.

Yeah, I know.