I'm at that
stage in my work on this model where I feel dismayed. I've finished
the composition, have stopped adding and rearranging elements. I've
filled in all the hollow areas and attached everything together. Now
comes the part where I clean it up, smooth it out, attend to the
little details.
This is the part
that feels overwhelming to me. I'm dismayed that I will ever be
able to get it looking like I want, dismayed at the amount of time
still necessary to get there. It's thick and clunky, the petals
graceless.
It's a sludgy
membrane I have to push through, convince myself that I'm not wasting
my time. Once I make a certain amount of progress, enough to let me
see that it is getting there, it is possible, then the feeling
dissipates and I become eager to finish.
But right now,
it's a struggle.
and i was thinking how exquisitely beautiful it looked!
ReplyDeleteHell yeah it's a sludgy membrane. That, too, is reason enough to push through.
ReplyDeleteIt's the creative process.
So glad you're in the midst of it.
Actually your post can be applied to all sorts of things really - I'm that at that stage of my training for Liverpool. The point is you have to keep going otherwise all the time already spent is going to be a waste of time.
ReplyDeleteBoy I know exactly how feel. I go through the same thing. It seems I can never get it to look like I envisioned it in my head. Sheesh!
ReplyDeleteThat is what keeps me moving forward I guess.
Ha
Hugs
SueAnn
I can appreciate this. It's as though you want the end result to be here already, because it will be so much better than it is now [you hope] but the process of getting there is cumbersome. A burden you just want to hand over to someone else, so you don't have to think about it anymore, but know that you have to do it yourself.
ReplyDeleteKeep at it Ellen. I find it beautiful now, eye of the beholder thing I guess, but know that it will be what you want it to be. Soon.
I agree with TexWis - I think it's beautiful at this stage too (but for some really I just really really like the wax molds - maybe because they look like chocolate?). But I'm going to take your feelings and apply them to a journey in my own life - slogging through is a necessary step. Just don't STOP!
ReplyDeleteIt will be fun to see the finished product
ReplyDeleteAh, nothing is easy, even if it ends up giving you lots of pleasure at the end. Thank God we don't stop and give up at this stage.
ReplyDeleteWere it delicious chocolate, as it appears, it would already be gone to great fanfare and applause!
ReplyDeleteI can relate to your struggle in my running when I'm training for a marathon. I'll love the finish product, but while I get there it's a struggle. Sometimes...many times writing an essay is the same way
ReplyDeleteI feel like this often, but in my case it is with words.
ReplyDeleteHow odd I recognize the struggle as a familiar one!
How strange that seems to me. Is it that you suffer from the artistic temperament? You know you are good and you know that you will do it, how come the butterflies?
ReplyDeletehummm, a perfectionist,,,I reckon...One wonderful thing (amongst a bunch of other good things), about you liberals, there are absolutely great artists among you. All you have to do is look at your work...thanks,,Glenn
ReplyDelete