discouraged, dismayed, disgruntled, discontent, displeased, dissatisfied, dispirited.
There. I said it.
I haven't been posting the last few days because I have been in a mood that I can't shake and I didn't want to put a bunch of negativity out there.
The last panel came out with two flaws. It looks like it cracked and healed again but it runs vertically in one of the fans. Also, one of the pieces of fiber paper migrated and blended with another. I don't care (well, I do care but...), I am going to go ahead and set up the installation. If the client notices and says something, I'll deal with it then.
I've been doing some of the cold work to finish some of my cast pieces and in this frame of mind even my castings are falling short. They will sit forever in the galleries with all the rest of my pieces, unsold, unwanted. That is if I ever get anything finished.
My four proposals I have out are waiting waiting waiting. I wonder if we will ever get any work again.
I know that this will pass. All it will take is this job finished with happy clients and at least one of my proposals coming in.
I know there are so many people out there in far worse shape than I am which is another reason I haven't wanted to pour out all this 'poor me' crap.
But I'm hoping that finally venting this will help to make it pass.
OK, I'm going back to work now.
sorry about the glass Ellen, things are hard in this economy. I will pray the work comes in for you. Worrying can sure effect a mood. It sure does me sometimes. Be well.
ReplyDelete"dis" is the pits. If I said when it rains it pours I'd be inappropriate. If I say buck up little buckaroo, I'd be an ass. So I'll just say.....damn, hope it gets better and know you know I mean it. The Olde Bagg, Linda
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about your "dis" moooo-d. I hope you hear moo-mentous news soon on your proposals.
ReplyDeleteSorry, it's the cow thing.
Perhaps you just need some dis-tance ... Hang on.
ReplyDeleteAs you know I have those weeks myself, and Dr. Linthead is definitely having one this week. Sadly, it makes me want to throw something at him (what, me compassionate?). But I don't want to throw anything at you. I just want good things to happen dammit!
ReplyDeleteWhen the going gets tough, the tough get going - and you're going to be fine!
ReplyDeleteThat's why I have chosen a more forgiving medium to work with- Wool forgive and forgives Of course there is a difference- what you are doing is ART what I am doing is craft at best. I don't think I could handle that sort of disappointment after all of the work involved with out chucking everything- You are amazing. Why have you not put your art on a site where people out here can seek and buy? Too difficult to pack up and send would be my guess.
ReplyDeleteI hope things turn around for you soon and that by putting this out there, you've cleared the way for positive change.
ReplyDeleteYour stuff is NOT going to languish in galleries - it is too lovely do that. [And I am not biased. :P ]
ReplyDeleteI know it is hard to kick out of a funk, but I am sure as soon as one of the proposals comes back accepted your mood will improve - and look! Spring is just around the corner and that is always a mood brightener.
[I am not helping here, am? Damn.]
Hang in their sweetie - you are too talented to be held back. We believe in you.
[And I lied. I am too biased. heehee]
I am inclined to want to sit with you with a pot of coffee and some lovely cookies or danish between us (cats are good for sitting on laps too...so we'd invite the kitty to join us), and we could simply roll our eyes and sigh on occasion while experiencing the moment. Then I'd give you a big old hug and I'd say..."Sometimes your the windshield, and sometimes you're the bug."
ReplyDeleteImagine it, since I can't actually have coffee with you, and know that I'm there, venting with you in spirit.
Hang in there, Ellen. This too shall pass. It WILL get better, I promise. You are so talented I just know everything will turn around.
ReplyDeleteI saw a poster on pinterest.com yesterday that said "When things don't go right...Go left." lol.
ellen - my creative work is entirely curricular at this point in my life so i create materials and then take them in to see if they function well with twenty seven little humans. if they don't then their learning trajectory is altered and i have to figure out a way to ramp it up again. some lessons are like fratcured glass but then i get to see where the light breaks through and go after that even harder! steven
ReplyDeleteGlad you vented. Yes, let's remember that there are lots and lots of worse cases out there.
ReplyDeleteI find that these things gather in groups. You'll have days on end of bad news, frustrating events, etc. Then all of a sudden, they'll all work themselves out and you'll be on the positive side of things. So hang on until the tide shifts.
ReplyDeleteYou're a human being AND an artist and therefore entitled to a three-dimensional existence - which includes foul moods of every stripe.
ReplyDeleteYou are not monochromatic, Ellen. You have layers and depths. This is precisely why we love you.
Or at least why I do.
It's amazing how much our posts are alike and how much we both hate to complain
ReplyDeleteI like that about us
I hope you get good responses to the proposals SOON
Cyberhugs! ;)
ReplyDelete