Thursday, August 13, 2009

damn, how did that happen?

Husband/Partner/Lover/Friend and I are having our 33rd anniversary tomorrow.  I have spent more than half my life with this man.  It hasn’t always been easy.  In fact it was damn difficult for a long time and for awhile there I wasn’t sure we were going to make it.  I was sincerely doubting what seemed like destiny at the beginning.  But now that time seems far away.

This is the story of how I met Marc in 3 parts.  It has a preface and a prophetic dream.

The Preface:

I think I’ve always known several things about who he was or was going to be although, at the time, I didn’t know that’s what it meant.  My first boyfriend was in the 3rd grade,  His name was Mark.  He gave me the biggest, flashiest, glass diamond ring you ever saw.  Then several weeks later, he broke up with me, asked for the ring back and gave it to my best friend.  I think he went to a different school the next year.  That’s the first Mark I remember being attracted to.  Throughout my growing up years, three things became sort of constants.  Any boy with the name Mark (and if it was spelled with a ‘c’ he got extra scrutiny) was the subject of interest although I only dated one other Mark besides my 3rd grade heartthrob, any boy who was Jewish also attracted my interest and once there was a boy Marc with a ‘c’ who was Jewish but I quickly lost interest in him, and I tended to be attracted to guys younger than me.  I remember this in retrospect knowing what I know now.  

And so I grew up, dated various guys, had a long term relationship, ended that, had a troubled two years after high school, and one day agreed to a blind date set up for me by the sister of a guy I kinda liked.  Mainly the reason I agreed to it was because when the sister asked the guy for my phone number and told him why she wanted it, he didn’t object.  Kinda pissed me off.  That’s how I met my first husband (whose name was not Marc).  When I opened the door, it was one of those dumbstruck moments when you feel like you already know this person.  We ended up getting married when I was 21 (that’s a whole other story) but I knew, even on our wedding day, that it was already ending in my heart, that I would not stay married to him and that it was the only real way out from under my father’s thumb, a place I desperately no longer wanted to be.  I know that sounds silly in this day and age but back in the early 70s, women were still subordinate and were denied many things.

Tune in tomorrow for The Prophetic Dream.


  1. My goodness, Ellen, you're going to reveal it all.

  2. Oh, I was giggling so much from the picture, I could hardly read your post. Can't wait for the next installment.

    Is the pic titled the Glassmakers' Gothic? It's priceless!!!

  3. Very interesting. And how cool to do this in parts. Wow. Can't wait to read the Prophetic Dream. And congratulations on 33 years!

  4. I love reading about how people met. Can't wait for the next instalment!

    Happy Anniversary xxx

  5. I remember those days in the 70's. Can't wait to hear more. BTW - Happy Anniversary.

  6. hi ellen, i'm so intrigued by your story and especially by your prescient knowing of the name!! the wibbly wobbly journey of relationships - can you imagine what it's like for people who meet someone in high school, marry them, live with them their whole life, don't seem to have any problems or ugliness and then die happy? nope, me neither!!! i'm looking forward to the next installment that's for sure. steven

  7. Happy anniversary Ellen. I think this is going to be good reading! I'll stay tuned! Lizzy

  8. Hey! I had to jump through some google hoops just to leave a comment. Does this mean I have to blog as well? Who would want to read it?

    Anyway, Happy Number 33 to you and Marc. Hopefully will see you in Chicago come Nov.

    Take care!

  9. Happy Anniversary Ellen and Hub. 33 years is most impressive.

    And love the "how we met" kick off.

  10. Thank you one and all for the good wishes. I'm pretty amazed myself.

    Willow - some years ago we participated in a calendar thought up by a glass related BB. This was our entry.

    Hey John! - me too.

  11. Happy anniversary! Can't wait to read the rest!

  12. Looking forward to the whole tale. (Congratulations! I too was startled when I added things up one day and realized my marriage had lasted more than the preceding 25 years. . .)

  13. Hi Ellen

    you have begun a riveting serial...

    Happy days

  14. Another layer of what you started (maybe it didn't start there) in your comment at my Woodstock post. I'm convinced the choices we make are just right for the moment we're in them.


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